Charity Never Faileth

image taken from: http://thefieldofflowers.wordpress.com/2013/11/20/chrysanthemum-symbolism/

Today in the car  I was listening to a talk by one of my favorite story tellers, and favorite people, President Thomas S. Monson. It was from an address he gave at the General Relief Society Conference in 2010, called "Charity Never Faileth." The story he tells is so moving, and something I feel is important for all of us to remember that I decided to go off course a little bit in what I thought would be my second entry and share this story. 

A classic account of judging by appearance was printed in a national magazine many years ago. It is a true account—one which you may have heard but which bears repeating.

A woman by the name of Mary Bartels had a home directly across the street from the entrance to a hospital clinic. Her family lived on the main floor and rented the upstairs rooms to outpatients at the clinic.

One evening a truly awful-looking old man came to the door asking if there was room for him to stay the night. He was stooped and shriveled, and his face was lopsided from swelling—red and raw. He said he’d been hunting for a room since noon but with no success. “I guess it’s my face,” he said. “I know it looks terrible, but my doctor says it could possibly improve after more treatments.” He indicated he’d be happy to sleep in the rocking chair on the porch. As she talked with him, Mary realized this little old man had an oversized heart crowded into that tiny body. Although her rooms were filled, she told him to wait in the chair and she’d find him a place to sleep.

At bedtime Mary’s husband set up a camp cot for the man. When she checked in the morning, the bed linens were neatly folded and he was out on the porch. He refused breakfast, but just before he left for his bus, he asked if he could return the next time he had a treatment. “I won’t put you out a bit,” he promised. “I can sleep fine in a chair.” Mary assured him he was welcome to come again.

In the several years he went for treatments and stayed in Mary’s home, the old man, who was a fisherman by trade, always had gifts of seafood or vegetables from his garden. Other times he sent packages in the mail.

When Mary received these thoughtful gifts, she often thought of a comment her next-door neighbor made after the disfigured, stooped old man had left Mary’s home that first morning. “Did you keep that awful-looking man last night? I turned him away. You can lose customers by putting up such people.”

Mary knew that maybe they had lost customers once or twice, but she thought, “Oh, if only they could have known him, perhaps their illnesses would have been easier to bear.”

After the man passed away, Mary was visiting with a friend who had a greenhouse. As she looked at her friend’s flowers, she noticed a beautiful golden chrysanthemum but was puzzled that it was growing in a dented, old, rusty bucket. Her friend explained, “I ran short of pots, and knowing how beautiful this one would be, I thought it wouldn’t mind starting in this old pail. It’s just for a little while, until I can put it out in the garden.”

Mary smiled as she imagined just such a scene in heaven. “Here’s an especially beautiful one,” God might have said when He came to the soul of the little old man. “He won’t mind starting in this small, misshapen body.” But that was long ago, and in God’s garden how tall this lovely soul must stand! 

Appearances can be so deceiving, such a poor measure of a person. Admonished the Savior, “Judge not according to the appearance.” 

~Fairy Tales & Once Upon A Times~

                                   Photo by: Katy Ives

Almost every little girl grows up hearing Fairy Tales and things that happened “Once Upon a Time.” We watch Disney films and dress up in princess dresses and play with our dolls, sometimes pretending to be them, and other times playing the heroine in our own stories. We all have our favorites. Mine was Ariel from the Little Mermaid and, for years, my favorite fairy tale was 12 Dancing Princesses. 

Just after I graduated from high school, I saw a film that gave me a new favorite heroine and fairy tale. The movie was Penelope.  While she is technically not a princess, anyone who has read or watched A Little Princess knows that ALL girls are princesses. So, for me, Penelope is a Princess.

For those of you who have not seen this movie, I would recommend that you drop everything and watch it. Until then, I will give a brief synopsis, which may or may not contain spoilers.

Penelope was born into a wealthy, blue blood family that appears to have no problems, except for the family curse. A great-great-great-grandfather decided to have a fling with a servant girl and, of course, she got pregnant. He, at first, wanted to marry her, but his family thought it was laughable since she was “just a servant girl.” Ultimately, he married someone more “suitable,” and the servant girl threw herself off a cliff. Nice beginning to the story right?

The servant girl’s mother was also the town witch, and she wanted the blue bloods to feel the pain of rejection that her daughter experienced. So she cursed them that the next daughter born into the family would be born with the face of a pig. "Only until one of her own kind accepts her as their own, ‘til death do you part, will the spell be broken!"

Naturally, every young bride feared being the first to give birth to a girl. As fate would have it, they all had sons, who had all sons, who had all sons… until Penelope.

Her parents were devastated, but there was nothing that they could do except hide her from the press who were clamoring for a peek at the pig face girl. Ultimately, Penelope’s mother faked her daughter’s death and locked her away for 25 years, which were spent becoming the ideal bride.

When she was 18, her mother hired the matchmaker to the rich and famous, but every young suitor that saw Penelope would freak out and jump out the window. (Wow! That would make you feel pretty good about yourself!) For 6 years, she watched as every guy recoiled in horror.

Finally, Penelope couldn't take it anymore. She realized her mom was never going to give up on the idea of finding her a husband, and she was tired of waiting for the day she could start living her life. So she ran away from home and went on a journey of self-discovery. She met new friends who helped her along the way and showed her the world that she had never been a part of before.

On her journey, Penelope discovered that she was more than her face and that she was someone worth noticing. In the moment that she accepted herself just the way she was, she broke her own curse.  She didn't need some prince to change her. She had the power all along. Love and acceptance of herself was what made all the difference and were the only powers she needed.

I love this story because I finally have a princess whose story is like mine.  No, I was not born with the face of a pig, but I can tell you that, for years, I had thought I had been cursed...

I was not locked up for 25 years, but I was trapped by my own insecurities and low self esteem. And like Penelope, I waited for the day that my life would be different, and for somebody to make it happen for me.

So here is my story...

Purpose & Introduction ~

My name is Nikki Robison Nelson. I am almost 26 years old. I reside with my wonderful husband Aaron in Lindon, Utah. We’ll have been married for 2 years in October, and it has been the happiest time of my life!

We both work as managers at a book store while Aaron is finishing school. It may seem crazy that a husband and wife work together, but it is a joy for us. Anyone who has ever been around us knows that we are completely nauseating. And I think we will still act like we are in our honeymoon stage 20 years down the road.

I am a devout member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. An "Orthodox Mormon," if you will. I have a very strong testimony of my Savior, Jesus Christ, and what He has done for me and the active role He continues to play in my life.

I am originally from Heaven, :) but I was born and raised in Utah. I have the most wonderful parents in the entire world!  They have taught and raised me well and continue to be a huge blessing to me. I got my vocal inflections and sense of humor and deep Patriotism from my Mom, and I hope I have inherited some of my Dad's kindness and endless patience.

There are 6 kids in my family, 4 boys and 2 girls and we range from 27-11, which made growing up a lot of fun. :)  We don't always get along, but I still love them all very much. We grew up listening to Earth, Wind and Fire, Billy Joel, and Elton John. We had a good childhood filled with old movies and Star Trek: Next Generation, playing outside, and battling each other on Super Nintendo. We also spent many hours at our parents’ photography studio, which felt like a second home.

I love reading anything by Jane Austen and watching period pieces like Downton Abbey and Anne of Green Gables. I enjoy history and watching documentaries, but also appreciate and have a weird obsession with shows like Hoarders, and Extreme Couponing.  And Aaron and I still watch cartoons and Disney Movies!

I want to learn to play guitar and piano, and take voice lessons. I love to dance and have been taking Belly Dance classes on and off for about 5 years. I also enjoy West Coast Swing. I dance around the house and sing in the car at the top of my lungs. I have an impeccable memory for movie quotes and I can do a pretty spot on impression of Kari from the Incredibles. 

The name for this blog has a lot of personal meaning for me and it took a while to come up with. I wanted something meaningful that would stand out and show a little bit about me. “Padawan Warrior Princess” is a combination of a couple nicknames I've had.

"Padawan Learner" came from one of my best friends, Jon. He was known by some of his friends as "Master Jedi." I guess because I was a younger I, by default, became "Padawan Learner" Truth be told, I am not a Star Wars fan, but this nickname was given affectionately and I love it!

"Warrior Princess" came from one of my high school friends who would spend lunch time spinning fantastic tales about "Nikki, Warrior Princess & Her Army of Red Crickets!" I'm not sure what inspired them, but it was fun to hear stories with me as the heroine. I remember how excited my friend Dan became when he discovered that my name, Nicole, means "Victory of the people."  It just made the stories so much cooler.

I decided to put these two names together because they represent an eternal truth about me: I am Learning.  I am Fighting. And I am a Princess.

I believe everyone has a story to tell. Everyone has experiences that have shaped them into who they are. My story may not be the most dramatic or as remarkable as others’ triumphs over adversity, but the things that I have gone through have been unique, and the things that I have learned from them should not be discredited.

My story is about overcoming years of insecurity, low self esteem, and incorrect beliefs that I had about myself. And, literally, it took years to conquer those demons and come to realize that I am beautiful. My life has meaning and purpose, and I am literally a Daughter of God.

The idea of a blog has existed for a couple of years now, when a family friend who has been made aware and is familiar with my situation suggested that I write it. But it was never something I thought to do or even really could do until a couple months ago when I felt really strongly that I needed to write my story.

The purpose of this is still unclear to me. Whether this is just supposed to be for my own records or for some greater purpose. But I really hope that by me sharing my story it will help someone who has been in a similar situation. Anyone who has ever felt insecure, or was told that they were not beautiful, or has been picked on and disregarded. If there is something that I could say that could help just ONE person know that they are of worth, that they are loved and that everything will be okay then everything I have gone through, all the pain, all the hurt and anguish and the tears and sorrow and years of waiting will be worth it. Just for ONE person.

So whoever that one person is.... this is for you.